When we decided to leave the hotel and go into Marrakesh we realised just how manic it is. There is absolutely no traffic system here so rent a car at your own peril. Other than the odd traffic light people do whatever they want in whatever lane they want, which was a huge culture shock and meant having an anxiety attack in every taxi I went in.
There are hundreds of people in the main square selling something or other, which, is something to be aware of. (If like me you struggle to say no to people I'd possibly avoid this place or you'll return with 320 fake Louis Vuitton bags and 45 rugs). We ended up getting so tired of saying ''no thank you'' to every single person trying to flog us something that we ended up just wearing sunglasses constantly and not engaging with anyone.
We ate in the square twice during our 6 day stay and I had pizza both times, neither restaurant served alcohol for obvious reasons (if you don't know what the obvious reason is you need to stick to Ibiza honey) but I am aware there are restaurants in the square that do.
If you are an animal lover you will be quite shocked at the appalling amount of animals used for entertainment in Morocco. Once I got over the sheer amount of stray cats running around starving (my heart still bleeds for them) I then had to deal with monkeys chained at the neck, horses that looked absolutely exhausted and snakes treated very poorly. I don't even like snakes but no living creature should be chucked about like a yo-yo. If you do ever go to Morocco - I urge you not to engage with the men with the monkeys, they will a) demand payment for taking a photo of you with a poor little monkey and b) you will indirectly be encouraging these people to continue to use animals in this way. It might seem cool to have a photo with a monkey on your shoulder but my understanding is these animals are treated very poorly, by boycotting these money making schemes the locals are less likely to continue to do it.
Due to my moral issue with the animal welfare in this country I purposely didn't take any photos of them...so here's a photo with some camels which again, we purposely didn't ride for ethical reasons
I was unbelievably original in Morocco and decided to get a henna tattoo....now I realise these are very controversial and actually, in hindsight I'm not sure I would get one again. The ''henna ladies'' of Morocco are pretty much the biggest scam artists in the entire country. So much so we still laugh about our experience 2 weeks later. Before I sat down to have mine done I, and the overly polite lady doing the henna agreed to ''pay whatever you think is necessary''. So, as you can imagine I was pretty horrified at the end of my tattoo for the lady to demand 800MAD (that's like, £70!!!) Luckily for me my boyfriend has bigger balls than me and was happy to tell them to get lost, but was happy to pay 50MAD (about £3.50). That's what the ''art'' is actually worth according to the hotel staff so don't get roped into paying more than that!!! We then were told to ''go fuck your mothers motherfuckers'' by what had originally been nice old ladies telling me how my henna tattoo design would bring me good luck and lots of babies so yeah...be warned. There are also horror stories circulating about the potentially harmful ingredients used in black henna tattoos so probably best to avoid.
As for the souks and what Morocco is renowned for...they are crazy shit. A pretty cool experience but so claustrophobic and a nightmare for blokes trying to sell you stuff you've already said no to 17 times. I really wanted to be all Carrie circa Sex and the City 2 and get some cool shoes but settled for a pashmina instead. Haggling for a decent price however took about 20 minutes. Generally speaking the merchant is happy to take 40%-50% of their original offer, and it's polite not to take the piss too much and demand something for really really cheap. These people need to make a living too remember and these people are not paid well to begin with.
It is quite easy to get the impression in Morocco that everything is a tourist trap in one way or another, and you do feel obliged to tip every local you come into contact with. As a rule of thumb I'd recommend tipping the locals you are actually impressed by, otherwise it gets hella expensive... Other than that I felt safe, had a great time and met incredible people both locals and fellow tourists. I did get a fair amount of unwanted male attention, and men would regularly blow kisses even when I was with my boyfriend but I never felt unsafe. I think it's important that as visitor in an Islamic country regardless of how liberal they are that you respect their culture and values, which does include covering up as a female. (A maxi dress that covers your shoulders is fine). If you don't you may attract extra unwanted attention and I actually think its disrespectful to the women there more than anything else.
Oh yeah...we also went quad biking but I bloody hated it so didn't think it warranted a whole paragraph. If you do however enjoy fearing for your life and getting covered in sand it's right up your alley.
